Parting Clouds

At the moment I am in Our Nation's Capitol (Capital? I always get those confused).

I've seen five lovely friends, and will see another this evening.  All the peeps I really needed to reconnect with.

I was a bit of a disaster when I got here (WHAT) but the recharge my soul has enjoyed in the past four days - I am so grateful.

Another word on how my depression works:  Unlike many instances of depression mine is not conditional or situational - nothing 'triggers' it.  I just start falling into the abyss.  In fact it would probably be more manageable if it was conditional.  If something totally sucky happened I could be all, Let's stock up on the Effexor!, but that's not how it works for me.

In fact, the majority of that last post was written over a year ago, but it sat as a draft I did not want to complete.  But it holds true. 

I received some wonderful emails in response to that post.  Folks in the same place, folks wanting to share the post with family members that are also suffering; folks simply saying they are there for me.

My friend J, Everyone's Favorite West Coast Lesbian, (Look it up, People) reminded me that our friends don't need us to be happy and pulled together; they just need us.  Beautiful words.

That said this trip has made a world of difference. 

I won't go into it all, but something I will say about myself - I am a demonstrative, physically affectionate person.  I'm a big hugger.  I will pet your hair, hold your hand, drape my arm around you and 'love your neck' as my grandma used to say.  So being with my DC peeps and offering true affection for the first time in a long while and having it returned, emotionally and physically, has been a wonderful thing.

I know the same is awaiting me when I get home to The Emerald City.  I hope the clouds have parted enough that I can accept the care and affection all my Seattle friends offer me as well.

I think I'm on the mend.

In Other News:  I have an interview Friday.  This is at a semi-unbelievable place, which never hires 'newbies', and the interview itself falls under the category of 'It was wonderful just to be nominated.'